poetry

5.Cold Winter with heaters

7.People wrapped in blankets by the heaters

5.No more going out

7.Only cocoa beans left girls

5.Time to sleep good night

7.Empty trees iced houses cold people

Show Not till

Within 6 minutes we were there

3 minutes sitting  on the bus.

Shaking so hard

Wobbling my feet  like Mad

time is ticking

we Jump out of the bus

Counting in my head.

Lyndel said well done and ticked my name.

I ride back to the line  hanging my fingertips on the side of the handlebar.

Time to go to the light track lifted my back wheel up.

Wobbling,

Shaking,

Turning,

Counting,

and then and then and then, lunch time.

The movie was usual enough

The Movies was usual enough; it had

A screen, a roof, A movie, a sky.

people, drinks ,pop corn, ice blocks.

Over it, and even a small tin bin.

I never went to the movie and watch home.

My sister, my cousins and I

did what girls do talk and laugh.

watching the movie while laughing, enjoy the movie.

eating  popcorn, watched and listened while watching home.

just finished movie love it

Doing nothing important

The Holiday

                                                              Success Criteria

DEEP FEATURES Brainstorms to identify main ideas to be used in writing. Uses most of the main ideas in the writing. Uses paragraphs and sequences ideas. Attempts to end writing with a simple conclusions.

SURFACE FEATURES Spells most words correctly. Uses capital letters, full stops, commas, apostrophes, question marks, exclamation marks.

THE REWORKER / EDITOR Rereads writing to edit out ainformation that does not improve the message. Rereads writing to edit in words and phrases that improve the message. Uses a dictionary to identify and check spelling attempts. Checks writing for basic punctuation.

I  got into the car and it  took a long time for us to get there. Yay we’re here! I jumped out of the car and ran down the deep hill. “Ow ow ow” I got cut from the side of the tree. I jumped in and splash, the water came.

Yum Yum, ice cream. I had ice cream. My nan got it for 75c. I had vanilla and my big sister had cookies and cream. There were 8 cookies and cream and 8 vanilla. It was yum. Yum yum!

Yesterday I went to the skate bowl with 2 of my sisters and my cousin. We went there because it was a new skate bowl, but I was really, really scared.

Shopping is fun. I got for a toy, a book and pens. They were cool.

      

Stoney Creek Ranch Camp

A moment in time...

When Mum Turns Off The Light

I heard the tv as my sister is watching it.

I heard the birds on the roof of my room.

I felt the wind on my feet.

I felt cold as the wind came into my room.

I wondered if the wind will come onto my face.

I wondered if my mum will come and put me to bed.

I saw my cat on my bed lay down on my bed.

I saw my shadow.

By Te Atawhai